Recently, many women have been sharing with me that they have a lot more outside opinions than usual commenting on what they do with their money. And every time I tell them my favorite phrase ‘Your Bank Account, Your Rules’. Meaning: if that person’s name isn’t on your bank account they don’t get a say on what you do with your money.
Personally, it took me a long time to fully accept that phrase in my life. I always had (and honestly still have) family and friends tell me what was wrong with where I was spending my money. Why do you spend so much money on traveling? Why can’t you save more to buy a house? But no you can’t buy that house or live in that location. Why do you have to move your business to an RIA? Why can’t you just stay at the big bank like everyone else? And on…and on…
We have all been there feeling the weight of our family, friends, and even society telling us what we can and can’t do. It’s exhausting. You already work so hard for the money you have and to provide for your family to add on another layer of opinions and stress can make you feel like you are stuck on a hamster wheel.
This is where the mentality of ‘Your Bank Account, Your Rules’ comes into play. I would like to add one note that if you share accounts (as in their name is on the actual account) with a spouse, parent, or significant other they are the only other person that gets a say on how the money is being used. Unless that person has access to the account they (most likely) have no idea how much is going into it and the reality of how the money is being used.
You need to sit down and set up your own rules or even budget for your bank and investment accounts. Ask yourself questions about the goals of the account, what you will and won’t use that money for, and how you want to manage the cash flow. This process won’t be easy. It will be a daily struggle to not only stick to your rules but to also drown out all of the voices around you who want to comment on what you do with your money. But remember, ‘Your Bank Account, Your Rules’.